Wednesday was a day. I mean, really the whole week was, but Wednesday was particularly fun. Not fun, that is.
We got home from church and both kids were headed for bed. I was reading and rocking Kate in her rocking chair, and Sam brought in one of his books to share. So I had Kate on one side of my lap, Sam on the other. We read two books and sang Kate's songs. Afterwards, we said prayers in turn, and Sam and I tucked Kate into her bed. Sam gave her a kiss, and she had to give Sam a kiss.
I was sitting there listening to the three of us singing together "Jesus Loves Me" and "Away in the Manger" and was moved by the stage of life we're in. The idea that they would both want to sit on my lap and sing songs together is really unusual-- a moment in time that will pass as quickly as it came. How blessed am I to have that moment. It wasn't a moment for grandma or daddy or papaw. It was for me. And boy did I need it.
I wish I could say I will remember it forever, but in truth, it will probably fade into the back of my mind with all of the other good moments. Over time, it seems that the good moments blend together in a general warm happiness. I wish I had a picture or a video on youtube to cherish or show at a wedding or graduation party. The best moments never come with a camera around.
Monday, February 9, 2009
Thursday, February 5, 2009
January Pictures
I know, I'm a little late. But I have some cute pictures of Kate's gymanstics "graduation." She's growing up, and she really likes 'nastics class. 
Kate is jealous of Sam's cubbies vest. So she took renewed interest in this hand-me-down and was calling it her cubbies vest.
We've taken to having Thursday night movie night. Here are my happy kids ready to watch with mama.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
The artsy one
Sam has always been creative. He and I will make up stories together to pass the time, and he has always had a very active relationship with his stuffed animals. He used to pretend that his friends were over, even when they weren't.
But I've never thought of him as artsy. He never has liked to color, draw or paint. I love to color, so that always disappointed me. He'll do playdough, but not for long. He really doesn't like to get his hands messy. Once, a family member gave him an art center. It's in storage.
So yesterday, when I picked Sam up from pre-K, his teacher showed me some of the things he had made, and he started to tell me what he was working on in the art center and what we needed to do to finish it up. Miss Jaime (the teacher-- I know, it's confusing) said to me, "Sam is just an artsy kid. He's always working hard in the art center. He's very creative." Creative, yes. Artsy? Wow. Just goes to show that you never can tell...
But I've never thought of him as artsy. He never has liked to color, draw or paint. I love to color, so that always disappointed me. He'll do playdough, but not for long. He really doesn't like to get his hands messy. Once, a family member gave him an art center. It's in storage.
So yesterday, when I picked Sam up from pre-K, his teacher showed me some of the things he had made, and he started to tell me what he was working on in the art center and what we needed to do to finish it up. Miss Jaime (the teacher-- I know, it's confusing) said to me, "Sam is just an artsy kid. He's always working hard in the art center. He's very creative." Creative, yes. Artsy? Wow. Just goes to show that you never can tell...
BMB: The Discipline Diet
It’s the first of the year, and everyone I meet is on a “healthy eating” kick. In case you missed it, healthy eating is the new code word for dieting. No one’s dieting; they are adopting a more healthy lifestyle.
No matter what you call it, healthy eating is a lot like parenting. We’re all looking for the latest, greatest way to discipline our children, love our children, give them security and intelligence and self-esteem. So, a new book or idea comes out about how to best parent, and we’re all on it like ants on a picnic.
The problem is, whether it’s a new diet or a new discipline, I think the average person (assuming I’m that average person) has about a good week or so of new routine in them before life gets busy and you’re back at zero again.
Here’s my theory: We all have a baseline parenting style. Some of us are push-overs, or strict, or touchy-feely, or educational. Most of us are a combination of a lot of things—how we were raised, what we see on TV or on the playground, what the parent educator told us with our first child. Your day-in, day-out approach to raising your kids: that’s baseline.
A new method or strategy for parenting seems really promising, so the good parents that we are run home and put it into practice (read: try it out to see if it works). However, most of us are only willing to go at it so long without obvious results.
In that respect, dieting is much easier. At the end of the week, I’ve either lost a pound, or I’ve gained it. If I have gained, I can typically enumerate the super bowl snacks, lunch-time cookie and cake tasting that attributed to the problem. If I want to get back to losing, it’s up to me to go back to the method that produces the results I want.
With parenting, however, sometimes the results are not as obvious. Is my child’s good behavior because of my extra-good parenting technique, or is she just having a better week? Worse yet, is my son’s temper tantrum due to a lack of positive reinforcement or because he’s had too little sleep or because he’s just in a mood? Moreover, most of the parenting results I’m really after—success in school, moving out at age 21—don’t show up until much later.
The only hope I have in this is to keep trying—to replace old habits with new ones. In Galatians, Paul says this: “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” (Gal. 6:9)
How does that look? I've heard it takes 20 days to build a habit, and only 3 days to break a habit. So for 20 days, I need to consciously try to apply what I've learned. I can ask God for help. I can ask my friends for support. Whatever it takes. At the end of 20 days, evaluate. Instead of looking at my kids, I need to look more at myself-- do I like myself better as a parent when I talk like this or encourage this behavior or incorporate this tradition? If so, it's working, and I have finally worked my way through to a new baseline. Whew. Now I'm tired.
No matter what you call it, healthy eating is a lot like parenting. We’re all looking for the latest, greatest way to discipline our children, love our children, give them security and intelligence and self-esteem. So, a new book or idea comes out about how to best parent, and we’re all on it like ants on a picnic.
The problem is, whether it’s a new diet or a new discipline, I think the average person (assuming I’m that average person) has about a good week or so of new routine in them before life gets busy and you’re back at zero again.
Here’s my theory: We all have a baseline parenting style. Some of us are push-overs, or strict, or touchy-feely, or educational. Most of us are a combination of a lot of things—how we were raised, what we see on TV or on the playground, what the parent educator told us with our first child. Your day-in, day-out approach to raising your kids: that’s baseline.
A new method or strategy for parenting seems really promising, so the good parents that we are run home and put it into practice (read: try it out to see if it works). However, most of us are only willing to go at it so long without obvious results.
In that respect, dieting is much easier. At the end of the week, I’ve either lost a pound, or I’ve gained it. If I have gained, I can typically enumerate the super bowl snacks, lunch-time cookie and cake tasting that attributed to the problem. If I want to get back to losing, it’s up to me to go back to the method that produces the results I want.
With parenting, however, sometimes the results are not as obvious. Is my child’s good behavior because of my extra-good parenting technique, or is she just having a better week? Worse yet, is my son’s temper tantrum due to a lack of positive reinforcement or because he’s had too little sleep or because he’s just in a mood? Moreover, most of the parenting results I’m really after—success in school, moving out at age 21—don’t show up until much later.
The only hope I have in this is to keep trying—to replace old habits with new ones. In Galatians, Paul says this: “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” (Gal. 6:9)
How does that look? I've heard it takes 20 days to build a habit, and only 3 days to break a habit. So for 20 days, I need to consciously try to apply what I've learned. I can ask God for help. I can ask my friends for support. Whatever it takes. At the end of 20 days, evaluate. Instead of looking at my kids, I need to look more at myself-- do I like myself better as a parent when I talk like this or encourage this behavior or incorporate this tradition? If so, it's working, and I have finally worked my way through to a new baseline. Whew. Now I'm tired.
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